Thursday, April 25, 2013


imagine, if you will, that the most special moment(s) you ever had in life were always. 

that the happiness of those moments were for always. 

wouldn't that be something. 

I would love to freeze time forever. make the best days for always and never lose those emotions, those smiles and that happiness, that joy. 

but it goes away....doesn't it? Or does it?

that depends

what do you subscribe to?

do you subscribe to the world and it's ways?

Anderson Cooper is on CNN interviewing the Boston Fire Department
ESPN is broadcasting the NFL Draft
and somewhere, but not in my hotel room, the season finale of Project Runway is on

what if we subscribed to forever?
what if we all believed and...and....and....encouraged one another in that belief

would that belief come easier? 
would time become frozen....ahhhhhhhh

happiness in permanence

I think God calls it heaven

it is forever
it is always
encourage me
I will encourage you

there is nothing else, nothing else, but me...and you...nothing. 

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

the repertoire

Here is what I play- 

Wonder by Natalie Merchant
This is the first song I really learned. Especially the lyrics. Lyrics can be hard, but these lyrics came naturally and quickly. "They say I must be one of the wonders of God;s own creation, and as far as they see they can offer no explanation", that is the chorus and with my belief in God this came quickly. It lifts me up to know - " "I must be one of the wonders of God's own creation". And yet this is a song of pain and overcoming that pain with faith and love. 

Winter's Storm by Joshua James
I love playing this song....actually I love singing this song. I love immersing myself in singing the lyrics..By far the easiest song to play on guitar that I know and ranking up there as one of the most powerful songs I know.. 
A friend, Alex Miller, once encouraged me by saying- "some of the best songs I know are one chord.". Since I only play chords, right now, that was highly encouraging. This is not a one chord song, but close enough to what Alex said. The lyrics to this song are just drop dead powerful

Stars Go Blue by Ryan Adams
I have read in many places what this song means and what the writer Ryan meant when he wrote it. This  song does not really carry the same for me,, and I think that is okay. 
This song speaks to me of loneliness, something my personality feels all to often and it hits my heart. Yes, I have a family and an amazingly loving wife (who puts up with a lot), but all to often I am where the "stars go blue". 

He Loves by John Mark McMillan
This song speaks to my Christianity. Anyone who really knows me knows I try and try and try to be a godly man. I love singing this song to the masses, playing and singing it with a group of people. 
From the opening line - "He is jealous for me", He has me. 

Something Beautiful by Alexi Murdoch
Of everything I play I dream of mastering this simple, but amazingly powerful two sentence song. 
"May the grace of God be always in your heart, may you find the strength to know that; you are something beautiful"
"And I thought, that I saw, I thought I saw a light shine, thought I saw a light shine"
This song BLOWS ME AWAY. 

There are many songs that I started with that have not made the cut, but are still in the works-
Heart of Gold by Neil Young
Peace, Love and Understanding by Nick Lowe
To Love Somebody by the Bee Gees
Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd
Heroes by David Bowie
Hurt by Trent Reznor
God's Gonna Cut You Down by unknown; version I play by Johnny Cash
Silly Love Songs by Paul McCartney
Lantern by Josh Ritter
Can I Stay by Ray LaMontagne
...and the list goes on and on. 

If we should meet, I would enjoy playing anything I know with you dear reader. Thank you for reading and maybe even eventually listening. 

Thanks to so many people for music in my life- Judy Skeels, Adam Hill, Mike Weiss and the entire Upper Darby cru- Greg, Ricky, Aaron, Daniel, Sarah and Penny as well as Ben, Barbie and Louie. A big thanks to my locals- Gerry and Matt!! My camp alum- Mary, Mike, Debo, Tim and all the staff and of course my fam- Margaret, Sean, Aryn & Johnny and Taylor.
Playing has only been a part of my life in my latter years and you have all contributed more than you will ever know. 
And there is of course you....the reader. Thank you.
 I blog to get my emotions out, but to think someone may share them and love me, for me. Well...thank you. 
Grace - - Peace - - Love

what would you like to hear?

Saturday, April 20, 2013

things I have learned (so far)

    Love to Love & Give to Give
Of everything I have learned in life, from the awesomeness of the Beatles to not blindly sticking your hand in an evergreen tree (bees!!!). Loving to love and giving to give ranks as the most important of all.

If you are going to love, love. Do so without a return expectation and do the same with any giving you should do. 

It is easy for this writer, to love and give to those outside my family without any expectations in return, but I admit, it isn't as easy with my parents and siblings. As a matter of fact, I have no problem taking from them, but giving and loving? That's a difficult thing for me. And then giving time?! - wow, that is a whole other discussion?

I have always had a hard time in giving my time to my parental family and this bled into the family I started. I think I have done better then expected, but gee, the cliche' of wishing I knew then what I know now holds very true. 

So here we stand with the reversing of time impossible and what have we learned?

If you should love, love. Do so, to do so. 

If you should give, give, and do so, to do so. 

And I think we should all do so. 

Thursday, April 18, 2013

do u think u r more beautiful then u say?

"tell me about you?" 

"my mom told me I had a big jaw"

"I look closed off and fatter"

describe yourself, then listen to a stranger describe you

"her eyes, they lit up when she spoke" 
is someone else describing you, imagine it was you describing you
Is that far-fetched????

That is exactly how God describes you. It truly is. No matter what others have told you, including your parents, family, friends and enemies; 
God describes you with amazing beauty. 

Not just because He loves you, but because He LOVES YOU.
I have a friend who every time he leaves your presence he says, while looking in your eye ~ ~ "God loves you"


God loves ME!!!!!!

and he loves me for who I am 
not who I want to be
not who I used to be

not anything, 
but who I am


and He loves u 2 4 who u r 

special thanks to my favorite oldest child, Sean, for giving me the inspiration for this blog - CHIVE ON! - 

this will add insight

peace love grace

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

bears, bears and a pig or two

I woke up to the sound of the birds incessantly chirping, albeit in New Jersey, it could have been the jungles of Central America. It was not the birds that woke me, but the countless grizzlies/black bears and giant pigs haunting my mind as I slept. 

I had left the group, wandered away so to speak, and I could see everyone from afar, but I was ad mist the danger of the bears fast approaching me. I scurried down the side of the hill which was like a pueblo, thinking I could get back to my group. 

It was then I heard pig noises as I pressed against the wall and a pig the size of an large car rushed by. 

And then out in the distance....I saw her, the love of my life coming my way, hand outstretched. And I awoke. 

This made me think;
No matter how far I wander away from God. 

No matter how I fail to be good or do good to others.

No matter my transgressions on this earth. 

When I call on Him, He answers, He listens, He loves. 

His hand is outstretched.