Tuesday, January 31, 2012

speaking



I admit it, I am a poor listener. I can bully with words and my listening skill is only endorsed by my ability to interrupt other speakers.
He who answers before listening— that is his folly and his shame.
He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.   Proverbs

I wish this were all easy. After close to 30 years of marriage and 48 years of living, as indicated by the stocking stuffer book pictured above, received this past Christmas, I have a long way to go. 

I once even read a book (Planet Walker) by Dr. John Francis who walked North America and did not utter a word for 17 years as he walked. Our educational systems thought so much of him they gave him a PhD.  The book didn't help.  

Most often people say if you know your problems, then you can address them and while I find this true, I also find it difficult. I had a counselor write the following down for me....while it has been helpful I could use this tattooed on the back of my hand at all times. 
Before you speak-
Is it necessary?
Is it helpful?
Will it edify?
Is it said in loving kindness?

The key being BEFORE YOU SPEAK.   I will continue to work towards thinking before speaking and responding instead of reacting and only speaking when NECESSARY and using my words when they are helpful and only doing so in loving kindness.

Thanks to my lovely wife Margaret, and our children; Sean, Aryn and Taylor for they have listened to me for far to long and thanks for God's amazing grace for it has no limitations.

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